Can't I have ANYTHING nice??

So the only time I feel compelled to post on this blog is when I furious at my boys. I love them, would die for them even, but sometimes....man I could kill them!!! Not literally, relax!

I'll catch you up on something that we are doing this summer, so this will make sense. We have gone "TV free" for the summer. I had our Direct TV service suspended until the first of August. We did this because any given night, you would find the four Hicks's scattered throughout our home watching four different TV's. We don't allow our kids to have TV's, computers or video game systems in their rooms. I just think that's too much freedom, and time alone. I never thought that we would all seperate to our four corners anyway. Here's the lowdown: Larry would be in the den watching the big screen, Lucas would be in the play room, I would be in the master bedroom and poor Brody would watch the kitchen TV, snacking throughout the evening. Very rarely did we all agree on anything, so we just split up. I was badly addicted to my DVR and loved not having to watch commercials, or anything that wasn't reality TV or HGTV. So I didn't. Larry likes crime mysteries and generally anything where there is blood shed and violence. Lucas likes science fiction and some police drama stuff. Brody keeps it simple with Disney, or cartoons.

I'd had enough, so I decided we were going to spend the summer together, like it or not. The boys were not thrilled, but they took it well. Larry was all on board, as he usually had a sore neck and back from falling asleep in said den and not waking up until 2:30 in the morning and having to climb two sets of stairs to go back to sleep beside his loving wife who wouldn't go wake him up hours ago. I knew it would be hard, but I thought (still think) that we would gain so much. With Lucas being 13, I knew that what little time we had left with him, would largely be taken over soon with other interests as he began freeing himself from our tight grasp.

It started out well enough. There would be a little grumbling about being bored during the day, but the boys kept themselves busy. We frequented RedBox and Blockbuster online and found good family movies that we could all agree on. Now, of course, we had many debates, Lucas and I, in front of the old RedBox about how movies were rated R for a reason. His theory was just because it was for violence and language, that was no reason not to watch it. We ironed all those kinks out, and can usually agree now. Sometimes we rent a movie, sometimes we have a wii bowling/tenis tournament (Brody is the reigning winner in bowling, Lucas is the tennis champ). We played Uno until we realized that Brody was a pretty good cheater and a pretty sore loser. We are working on that too this summer!!!

Okay, so back to last night. We had the movie ready for after dinner and as we all rushed down the stairs, I heard the boys "calling" their favored spot to sit for the movie. Larry always has the recliner, I have the comfy chair with the ottoman. Nobody ever challenges those spots. That only leaves my cute red coach.

When we bought our house almost 5 yrs ago, I am sad to say, I for the first time bought new furniture. Every stick I'd had until that time had been hand me down or second hand furniture. I was very thankful, but I was so happy to actually pick out furniture for our bedroom, living room and den. I loved my red couch. I like the bold statement it makes, I love it next to my comfy yellow chair, I just love it.

Again, back to last night. For some reason, both boys prefer to sit on the right side of the couch. It is no different from the other end, but they fight over it. If one should leave their position for any reason, the other would jump to sit on that end. Crazy! Anyway, we are all headed downstairs last night, and Brody yells, "I call the good side" and he takes a leap across the recliner and literally poll vaults into a sitting position on my favorite couch. I heard a sickening surrender, and Brody's bottom hit the floor. He broke my couch.

I would love to say I took it well, acted like a grown up and loved on my baby and told him that that was just a material possession and his little self esteem was more important than that, but I LOST IT! I screamed like an idiot about how I could never have anything nice, and how they seemed hell bent to ruin anything we did have that was nice and on and on and on. You get the picture. I'd like to also tell you that when Brody went crying out into the garage, I followed him, told him I was sorry and made him feel better, but I didn't. I wanted him to feel bad and boy did he.

Larry went about trying to fix my favorite couch, but when he removed that silky black bottom, we found out just how cheaply made my couch was. It was little more than ply wood and a few springs, barely connected. I actually think he said it was made from particle board, whatever that is. Brody actually broke a board clean into, but it was a small 2x4. Larry though he had it fixed and reinforced, but as soon as he sat on it, it broke again.

I am still heartbroken.

Of course I forgave Brody. Of course if finally went outside to check on him, and loved on him, etc. He does genuinely feel bad. He even offered to give me his birthday and Christmas money to buy a new one. Don't you remember when you were 10 and thought that the fortune in stuff you got for those two combined events could probably buy anything? Of course I would never take his money, but I thought it was sweet that he was that sensitive about it.

My whole purpose in writing this is to figure out why, Why, WHY are my children human wrecking balls? Is the rest of our stuff doomed to be junk? Should I even care, or just wait and watch and we continue to replace broken phones, couches, etc? Do I even patch the HOLES in the wall where Lucas built a spear and threw it at Brody, missing him but leaving a hole in wall that Lucas filled with GUM? Should I be concerned that there are jagged edges in the window in the playroom because the boys disobeyed and played baseball indoors and broke a single pain of the double pain windows?

Maybe I should just let it all go, not worry about it. Wrap my mind around the fact that until they are grown, my stuff is subject to their whims and fights, and there is nothing I can do about it.

Or, maybe I could just beat them into submission...yeah that's the ticket!

I hate Cell Phones

My sons are killers. They are cell phone killers.

I purchased Brody a brand new cell phone a few weeks ago since he was doing so well keeping up with his Go Phone. This was probably more of a convenience for me, as I often forgot to add minutes to his phone. Anyway, we received the phone, and he had it about 72 hrs before he jumped into the pool at the Sports Barn with it in his pocket. Now, I'm one smart mom, so I purchased "insurance" on all of our phones. I only paid $29.99 for this phone. I was told that there was a $50 deductable. Man. Okay, so seeing this as a teachable moment, I explained to Brody that I wasn't mad at him, accidents happen, but he was going to have to give me the money for the deductable. He wasn't happy. He has been earning money this summer doing chores and mowing lawns with Larry. He really didn't have anything he was planning on spending the money on, but he spent it in his mind about thirty times a day. This was a huge blow to him, but I figured he would be more careful with it, and it was a good lessoned learned.

Fast forward to about 10 days later. Larry called to tell me that HIS MOTHER called him and reported that Lucas (13 yrs old) jumped in the pool up at their house with his cell phone in his pocket. What the crap? Lucas was too scared to call me, so he had his grandmother call and tell Larry who in turn was supposed to call and "break it to me gently".

I'm really upset on so many levels. First because Lucas didn't call me himself. Second because Lucas gave my mother in law the impression that we would draw and quarter him for such an offense. Thirdly because Brody just did the SAME THING, and last but not least, unless I spend a fortune to get it here quickly, Lucas is going to the beach without a phone on Monday with our youth group at church.

My kids both enjoy their phones, but I have to be honest and admit that it is more for my piece of mind that anything. I love that I can contact either of them any time I want. I can only imagine what my mom went through when I was with my friends, or out on a date. I cannot stand when they go somewhere and don't answer or forget their phone. I guess that probably makes me a control freak(?) No, I didn't think so either.

Lucas did this exact same thing last year on the beach trip with the youth. He told me that some guys put wet clothes in a locker without his knowledge and the clothes leaked and damaged his phone. I didn't have insurance then, so Lucas had to use my old discarded PINK razor until his birthday in November where I upgraded him to a touch screen phone. He fessed up when Brody damaged his phone that he jumped in a pool that time too. Arggggghhhhh!!! I thought having to use the old pink razor would have been enough to make him cherish this phone, but boy was I wrong!

I guess I'll have to do the mean mom thing and have Lucas give me the money for the deductable and the overnight fee to get him a phone by Monday morning at 7:45 when he leaves. That will greatly reduce the wiggle room that he built for himself working hard this summer to earn money for the trip. I feel mean, but he needs to take some responsibility for this too.

Being a mom really stinks sometimes. I hate to be the mean one who makes them follow the rules, learn the hard lessons and eat veggies. I guess that's my lot in life. I guess I better go, I think I have some kittens to drown......

Facebook Addict

Okay, I'm pretty sure that I'm the busiest person I know. I have a husband that requires constant care and feeding, two energetic sons who never slow down or hush, a full time job that I'm so thankful I have and love and a part time job selling Thirty-One. I have wonderful friends and a full social life. Why then, do I spend so much time on Facebook?? It's really become a large sucking whole in my time!!! I heard someone call it Crackbook (Diana?) and I think she is right.

First off, let me say that I love catching up with old buddies from high school and even find out what is going on with my sister in Colorado occasionally, but do I really need an update about what people are preparing for dinner or how frustrated someone is with their utility company? You might think that I don't need that info, but I feel that I do not only need it, am compelled to check updates throughout my otherwise very busy, normally functioning day.

I blame my new Blackberry. Before I got it, I was only able to check FB on my 900 year old computer at home. The hospital blocked it (along with everything else that could be helpful or entertaining) and since it is such a hassle to even get logged on at home, it wasn't worth it very much. My Blackberry has changed all that. With a quick push of a button, I can find out when Emily New is napping and if Bernie's pipes got fixed. Is this really info that I have to have??

My theory about it is that I'm basically the nosiest person alive. I just want to know what is going on, mostly because I'm afraid I'm going to miss something. I think I need to establish a new group on FB called FB ADDICTS. We could have a 12 step program and forgive ourselves for all the wasted time viewing pics of people that we haven't seen in 25 years and either beating ourselves up that we look worse than them, or congratulating ourselves that we didn't end up looking as bad as them. I mean come on, how many pictures of children can you possibly take in when you really can't even place the parents for sure?

And what in the world is all the poking and flaring going on? I have never seen so many lame "causes" in my whole life! I find it very amusing to see which new ones pop up overnight. I confess, before I even turn the lights on in the morning, I grab my BB and head to the potty to see what everyone did while I was asleep. I need an intervention people!!!

There have been many positives from FB however. I started Shari Hicks Breast Friends, and while I did invite people to share their experiences, I didn't mean for it to become a "we all love Shari" group. But...I can't tell you how much I love logging on and seeing all my Moms and remembering each of their stories and having such pride in what I do and reaffirming that this is God's call on my life. I know I have been freaked out lately with the cuts in Blue Cross and our census being low and in my own mind trying to figure out how to top what God did by gifting me with my special job. I can tell you with all the certaintly in the world that there isn't a place I'd rather be than doing exactly what I am doing. I feel so lucky every day that I get to go to work and know that with God's help, I am going to have the tools to help some new mom feel better about her journey. I know that Loretta Hardy did this for me 13 years ago, and I'll never forget the mark she made on my life.

I guess FB will settle into a small part of my life eventually, but unti l then, I'll view a pic if you post it, and comment on everything from when Brody is nausious to when I'm going to bed for the night. If you see me in the mornings with red eyes and dark circles, just know that I was in full FB mode and couldn't turn it off!

Later Gator!!

Happy New Year

We had the best time last night at my house. Every year, we host a small New Year's Eve party. I like to do that for a couple of reasons. The first is that I don't have to leave my house and second, I don't have to worry about my kids being alone with a babysitter or messing someone else's house up. We have such wonderful friends, and this year was no exception on the fun! Bobbie and her grandson Dylan came, Cathy came by on her way home from the hospital and Mary Nelle came with Keiren and Aiden.

We ate, talked and rested, watched the kids play and fight, and then laughed until our sides hurt playing the wii. I am not the raining hoola hoop champ anymore and that makes me sad. Mary Nelle kicked by big ole' butt with her tiny one. It was really fun and I love having people over.

I've decided not to have any resolutions this year. Of course, I'd always love to lose weight and read my Bible and pray more, but this year, I just want to be better to myself, my family and my friends. I'm not making that a resolution, just a prayer that I can be more of what I want to see in others, gentleness, kindness, generosity of spirit, patience, thankfulness, etc.

I hope you all had a wonderful New Year's and a very prosperous and healthy 2009! Cheers!

Shari